We Need This Like We Need Another Fucking Hole In The Head!!!

Long Island Lolita, Amy Fisher, has finalized a deal with Dreamzone Entertainment to star in four adult films before the end of 2011.

I guess it's only fair turn-around that someone finally gets to shoot Amy Fisher in the face!


FYI... For those of you who may not get these jokes, Amy Fisher was convicted in 1992 for shooting Joey Buttafuoco's wife, Mary Anne, in the face.

Here, watch! It's hysterical!


Oh, and a little side-note... Amy Fisher is now a mother of 3! Yeah... I said, "a mother of 3."

Killer Porn!!!

As reported by The Sun, a 30-year-old UK woman, Nicola Paginton, was found dead with a vibrator at her side while porn still played on her laptop.


It was determined that this, otherwise, healthy young woman suffered a heart attack brought on by sexual arrousal. She was a nanny and according to her employer, appeared fit and healthy the previous day.


Please, please, please. When I die and people ask, just say, "natural causes." C'mon! If you can do it for Brittany Murphy, you can do it for me!

Also, if anyone finds out what porn she was watching, contact me immediately. I am in need of some killer porn.